Blood-drenched Beard

The first Saturday attraction on the small stage is a funny educational play with an ecological theme. Three actors dressed in black bodysuits act out dialogues and make jokes about deforestation, global warming, and the hole in the ozone layer — which really isn’t a problem because all we have to do is wear SPF 349 on our bodies and 686 on our faces, right, everyone? — as well as pesticides and the hormones used in animal husbandry, which, according to the script, make men impotent and cause girls to menstruate at the age of nine. Night is falling. In the Little Miss pageant, ten girls of nine or ten represent their schools. One by one they parade quickly before three judges, one of them the parish priest, and then pose for the audience. They are wearing country costumes with checked dresses, frills, and bows in their hair. Some are shy and awkward, while others try to strut like adult models with burlesque results. The presenter asks each of them if they have something to say, and they state their names, ages, and the full names of their schools, which in some cases are quite hard to pronounce, and explain why they like to study there. Some have memorized texts that talk about their communities or neighborhoods, but those who improvise get more applause, especially when they get confused and look vulnerable. The littlest of all freezes up completely, forgets the speech she has learned off by heart, and gapes at the audience. She sways this way and that with a little smile plastered across her face until she is removed from the stage to the sound of great applause. The winner is from Pinguirito School, which Pablo attends. She parades again and is given an indecipherable gift. Then the Teen Miss is chosen. There are only three contenders, all of whom have broad hips, heavy makeup, and hair straightened with a flatiron. The Areias do Macacu Community representative is by far the prettiest, but the Garopaba Radio candidate, the preppiest, wins. They are all given enormous bouquets, almost as big as themselves. An area is cleared in front of the stage for a ribbon-dance performance by a group of elderly people. The men and women dressed in typical country clothes sing and dance while holding the ends of colorful ribbons tied to a central post, and the choreography follows commands in verse given over a microphone by a singer. They change partners, reverse the direction of the wheel, and weave the ribbons together in a complex pattern. He thinks it is beautiful, but the audience that is pouring into the square grows impatient and starts making a noise. The two beauty queens were invited to watch the ribbon dance, but only the Little Miss stayed and has been forgotten up on the stage by herself for twenty minutes, standing there in the cold, without anything to do. He is approached by someone who calls him “teacher.” He suspects it is Ivana and confirms it when she jokes about the difficulty of the previous day’s training session. Ivana is with her husband, and they make small talk during two belly-dancing performances. Male members of the audience jostle for a position in front of the stage. The second dancer is representing the goddess Lakshmi, but the presenter can’t pronounce the name. He gives up after a few tries and just repeats that she is doing the “dance of the goddess.” The schedule of performances on the small stage ends, and Ivana and her husband say good-bye and go off to do something else. The main stage lights up for the Garopaba Talent Show. He is already drinking his third cup of mulled wine and decides to get a sandwich. In the queue he recognizes Tracksuit Man from the tuft of hair escaping over the top of his shirt. He didn’t last more than a few weeks in the pool, but he says he is doing Pilates and loving it. They soon run out of things to talk about, and he excuses himself to go and watch the rest of the talent show. When he joins the crowd again a local soft-metal band called Random Reflections is wrapping up its short performance with a wall of distorted electric guitar music and drum rolls. Immediately afterward a girl who can’t be any more than ten years of age gets up on stage and plays a song by Sérgio Reis on the accordion with surprising skill and sings in a high-pitched, melodious voice. The crowd claps enthusiastically.