Blood Red

“Quit being an asshole,” he told himself as he climbed out of his Subaru. “So the lights are off. Maybe they’re taking a nap, or they went to see someone.”

He stood outside the door for almost five minutes, his fingers cold and thick, before he finally opened the front door. There was nothing but darkness to see until he finally fumbled for the light switch in the hallway and flipped it to the on position. The room came into view and he sighed with relief. There was a part of him that had expected the bulb to have been removed or shattered.

What the hell had him so paranoid? He couldn’t begin to imagine. All he knew was that the last time he’d felt this nervous without a reason was when he’d been standing at the altar and waiting for Meghan to walk down the aisle.

“Anybody home?” His voice seemed to echo through the hallway.

There was no answer at first, and the fine hairs on his neck rose. Then there was a noise from upstairs and he cocked his head to listen more carefully.

There it was again: a moan, soft and feathery faint.

He moved across the hardwood floors and up the long run of stairs as quickly and quietly as he could, barely even allowing himself the luxury of a breath as his mind was filled with images of what might have gone wrong. He saw phantasmal pictures of Meghan dead or held at the mercy of a rapist while Avery was forced to watch. He imagined Avery, dead and bled out across the floor of his bedroom, with Meghan’s cold body over his, her body used to shield her dead boy. As he moved up the stairs quietly, his mind painted a thousand scenarios in which he found his family murdered or simply missing amid signs of a struggle. He had no strength at all and was so afraid of what he might find; his legs felt like someone had carefully removed the bones and replaced them with fiberfill.

Avery met him in the darkened hallway, his body seeming little more than a stain against the shadows.

“Avery? Where’s your mom, son?”

Avery moved a little closer and looked up at him, his eyes glittering in the near darkness. “Hi, Daddy.” He pointed to the master bedroom. “Mommy’s asleep. She’s tired.”

Alan frowned. “Tired? What did she do all day?”

“I don’t think she feels so good. She looks a little green.”

Meghan was normally the last person to get a cold or even a case of the sniffles. She had a constitution like iron. “Well, I guess I better see how she’s doing, sport.”

“She’s tired.” He sounded like he was talking to a little kid.

“I got that, Avery. I just want to check on her myself.”

He moved past his son, unconsciously skirting any contact with his own flesh and blood. Something wasn’t right here and it was driving him crazy.

He entered the master bedroom and flicked on the light, his eyes aching in the sudden illumination. Meghan was on the bed, dressed in the same nightgown she’d worn to sleep the previous night. She didn’t look like she’d moved much at all since he’d left for work almost ten hours earlier.

“Meghan?” He moved closer, feeling that cold spot in the pit of his stomach grow a few degrees colder still as he looked down on his wife’s prone body.

She opened her eyes and took a few seconds to focus on him. “Hey.” Her voice was raspy and dry.

“Hi, angel.” He leaned down and ran a hand over her forehead. Her skin was cool to the touch, but felt a little sweaty. “Are you feeling all right? Avery said you looked a little green, and I have to agree, honey.”

“Jus’ tired.” She smiled, her eyes focusing on him with the same clarity that she always seemed to have, and he felt relief thaw the ice in his stomach. “Feel like I haven’t slept all week.”

Alan leaned over and kissed her forehead, the taste of her running over his lips. “That’s because you haven’t slept all week.” He leaned back away and pushed a few errant hairs from her brow. “You’ve been worrying too much about Avery and other things.”

She nodded and closed her eyes. “I’m gonna sleep now, baby, okay?”

“Of course it is. Don’t worry. I’ll get something set up for dinner. Do you want anything?”

“No. Just sleep.” Seconds after the words were out of her mouth she closed her eyes and drifted into slumber. He sat with her for a while and watched her, amazed by her as he always was.

Downstairs, in the darkness, his son was waiting for him. Alan stood and stretched and then got into more comfortable clothes. His little boy would want company, and he’d already promised Meghan that Avery wouldn’t be left alone.

IV

There was a tension in the air that none of them would willingly acknowledge. There had been for several days and it wasn’t likely that the tension was going away anytime soon.

They were all independent men, the priests of the Sacred Hearts congregation. As a rule they worked together and then went their separate ways. But every Saturday night they got together and had a proper dinner. It was tradition and they never even discussed the matter anymore. It was simply a part of their regular routine and there was no reason for it to suddenly change.