Just as it had been with Clare, Toby Woodley’s demise had been but a minor blip in the ever-moving symphony of life in general that played on regardless. Were we each so insignificant, I thought, that our death would mean nothing more to most people than a slight inconvenience over collecting a car?
Clare’s death certainly meant more to me than that.
I still couldn’t believe she had gone for ever.
I listed in my head, yet again, the only reasons I could muster to explain why she would have killed herself and, yet again, I came up with precious few.
She must have been depressed. Surely people who kill themselves must be depressed. But depressed about what?
I kept coming back to the question of the elusive boyfriend. She had definitely been seeing someone — more than that, she’d been sleeping with him. I thought back to our conversation at that last dinner:
So who was Clare’s great lover and was he one of the two men that Carlos, the bellman, had seen go to her room?
But why hadn’t he come forward to grieve with the family?
He might be married, I thought. Or perhaps the affair had finished sometime between dinner and eleven thirty that night. Was that the reason she had jumped?
Or had it been to do with her riding?
Had someone else spotted what I had seen in the race at Lingfield? Maybe somebody had threatened to tell the racing authorities. I thought back again to something else Clare had said that night:
And how about Toby Woodley?
Were his death and Clare’s connected? Had someone killed him to shut him up? Had there been more truth to his articles than I’d given him credit for? Was there, indeed, a betting syndicate that had made a fortune laying Brain of Brixham in April?
I didn’t think there could be. For a start, the internet exchanges would have told the British Horseracing Authority if there had been any unusual betting patterns on that race, particularly as Clare had been suspended for riding carelessly in it.
Perhaps Toby Woodley hadn’t got the details completely right but, nevertheless, someone had thought he’d been close enough.
Overall, I was frustrated by my lack of information. I hoped that the Hilton Hotel’s CCTV film or the guest list from the Injured Jockeys Fund gala dinner might give me some clues.
Provided I could get hold of them.
I collected my car from Kempton at eight o’clock that evening, having cadged a lift from Warwick with a south-coast trainer who didn’t mind a brief detour off the M25.
‘It’s the least I could do,’ he said. ‘I was very fond of Clare.’
He dropped me at the gates of the Kempton car park and I walked through to the racecourse office. The only signs of the previous day’s murder were the white tent still covering the spot where Toby had died, and a very large number of police officers standing around holding clipboards.
‘Excuse me, sir,’ called one of them as I emerged from the office with my car keys. ‘Were you here yesterday evening?’
‘Yes, I was,’ I said. ‘I’m collecting my car, which was kept here. I was interviewed last night by Superintendent Cullen.’
He still wrote down my name and address on his clipboard. ‘Is there anything else you’ve remembered since you were interviewed that might be useful to us?’
‘No,’ I said. ‘Sorry.’
He let me go and I walked towards my car, which someone had moved over to the fence near the exit.
I felt slightly uneasy.
Less than twenty-four hours ago someone had been murdered in this car park. Stabbed in the back. While there was easily light enough to see the cars, there were plenty of dark shadows in which someone could be hiding. The hairs on the back of my neck stood upright and I spun round to check.
There was nobody there.
I laughed at myself. Of course there was nobody there.
Even a psychopath would surely think twice about murdering someone here with this many policemen about.
But I did walk right round my old Ford before I opened it, and I also checked the back seat to make sure no one was lurking there with intent.
They weren’t. Not this time.
12
On Friday morning I packed a suitcase and drove myself to Newmarket.
My original plan had been to come to Newmarket after racing at Warwick the previous day and stay for a couple of nights with Clare. But that plan had changed even before Clare’s death. About a month ago we had both sort of decided during a phone call that two nights was one night too many in the current belligerent atmosphere that had existed between us.