Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them

NEWT

Now, there’s absolutely nothing for you to worry about.

JACOB

Tell me—has anyone ever believed you when you told them not to worry?

NEWT

My philosophy is that worrying means you suffer twice.

Jacob digests Newt’s “wisdom.”

Newt picks up his case and Jacob follows him, stumbling over rubble and debris.

They stand at the entrance to the zoo. A loud snort comes from within.

NEWT

She’s in season. She needs to mate.

ANGLE ON THE ERUMPENT—a large, rotund, rhino-like creature with a massive horn protruding from her forehead. Five times his size, she is nuzzling up against the enclosure of a terrified hippo.

Newt takes out a tiny vial of liquid—he pulls the stopper out with his teeth and spits it to the side before dabbing a spot of the liquid onto each wrist. Jacob looks at him—the smell is pungent.

NEWT

Erumpent musk—she is mad for it.

Newt passes Jacob the open bottle and heads into the zoo.

TIME CUT:

Newt places his case down on the ground near the Erumpent and slowly, seductively, opens it.

He begins to perform a “mating ritual”—a series of grunts, wiggles, rolls, and groans—to gain the Erumpent’s attention.

Finally the Erumpent turns away from the hippo—she is interested in Newt. They face each other, circle round, undulating weirdly. The Erumpent’s demeanor is puppy-like, her horn glowing orange.

Newt rolls along the floor—the Erumpent copies, moving nearer and nearer to the open case.

NEWT

Good girl—come on—into the case . . .

Jacob takes a sniff of the Erumpent musk. As he does so, a fish flies through the air and jolts him, spilling the musk.

The wind changes. Trees rustle. The Erumpent takes a deep breath in—she can smell the new, more powerful aroma coming from Jacob.

Jacob looks around. A seal sits behind him looking guilty, before cheekily running away.

When Jacob turns back, he sees the Erumpent is now on her feet, staring at him.

ANGLE ON NEWT AND JACOB, realizing what is about to happen.

BACK TO SCENE:

The Erumpent charges toward the source of the smell, bellowing madly. Jacob wails, running as fast as he can in the opposite direction. The Erumpent gives chase—they crash through rubble and ice ponds before charging across the snow-covered park.

Newt draws his wand—

NEWT

Repar—

Before he can finish, his wand is whipped out of his hand by a baboon, which runs off, clutching its prize.

NEWT

Merlin’s beard!

ANGLE ON JACOB, tanking along, the Erumpent close behind him.

ANGLE ON NEWT, face-to-face with the curious baboon, which examines his wand.

Newt breaks a bit of twig off from a branch and holds it out, trying to persuade the baboon to trade with him.

NEWT

They’re exactly the same . . . Same thing.