Katya & The Prince of Siam

‘Lek and I always have plans for the future and our eyes burn with brilliance when we discuss our trip to Russia. I am sure we shall both be longing for St Petersburg when we are in Siam. I was so happy there and it was always such a pleasure, dear Elisaveta Ivanovna, to come to your house and to know I was loved there and that nobody looked daggers at me. I am afraid that is how they will regard me in Bangkok once they know I am the Prince’s wife.

‘Whenever I think of Easter without matins, my heart feels heavy.

‘

How will it be for me in Siam? Think of it, dear Elisaveta Ivanovna, being alone here without even letters everything seems worse and gloomier to me than it really is. I shall hope to write you a letter full of joy and happiness from Siam and indeed I am sure I will, for I shall be with my boy and everything will be all right.’

 

Nevertheless, Katya’s next letter to Elisaveta Ivanovna was still from Singapore and was no more cheerful in tone. Written to arrive in time for the latter’s name day she began:

 

‘I am cordially congratulating you on the day of your angel and wishing you health and peace of mind.

‘I am still in despair as on Thursday it will be three weeks since we arrived here and I have only received two of Lek’s letters. And I have not heard anything from my home for two months. I have a terrible feeling that a terrible scandal will break out on my arrival in Bangkok and Lek is obviously afraid it will be worse than we expected. Everything would have been easier if we could have been together now.

‘I have been praying the whole night asking God to prevent a misfortune and, although I have only known you a short time, I write without concealing anything, sharing my joys and griefs with you. I am sorry to trouble you with my letters, but frankly I have no one else to write to. My relatives do not know Lek and God knows what they would imagine if I write to them that I am still in Singapore without him and dying from sadness.