Chronicles From The Future: The amazing story of Paul Amadeus Dienach

My case has nothing to do with inspiration and creation. I was never blessed with such gifts and you cannot lose what you never had. My case is that of a traveller who never spoke about his adventures and who has finally decided to break his silence.

I have no friends; my mother is dead. I’m completely alone in the world. So, whoever you are, you who somehow, one day, will end up with my manuscripts, be my friend and feel me. Do not laugh and do not mock me. I’ve been tried and tested a great deal in life. Everything you read I’ve seen with my own eyes; I’ve lived it, I’ve touched it, I believe and I worship it all!

I will not return to my homeland; I have made my decision. I don’t need any obligatory, superficial relationships with the neighbours. I just want to tell my story in the most precise way possible; and I want to tell it to the end!

REBORNAugust 17th

It’s the twelfth day today and I’ve already commenced writing about it! Whatever happened to that combination of astonishment and horror of the first week, that religious awe in the sight of everything that, in the beginning, I considered supernatural? Where has the fear of losing my mind gone? All these mixed feelings lasted much less than expected. Here you have it then; man can, indeed, get used to anything! One can become accustomed to the most unbelievable things and will eventually return to one’s everyday routine.

(After a while)

Almighty God, the course that my life has taken was always planned by you and your desire. All these days and nights, only my faith has kept me from losing my mind over this incredible reality that I’ve been living. Have mercy on me, my Lord, and don’t deny forgiveness to your unworthy servant!

(At night)

It’s been three days now since I managed to drag myself out of bed and noticed something unexpected: my pains have vanished and I was able to walk even during the first few hours. The mirror is now the only reminder of the bandage that I still have wrapped around my head. And if what they say is true? They are to remove it the day after tomorrow. Have I recovered then? Can it be true? Am I not dead? Who could imagine and believe a miracle like this?

(Three hours later - dawn)

I even feel much better psychologically, after the soothing words of the physicians and my meeting yesterday with Johannes Jaeger. Before, my days and nights had been excruciating. The pain was nothing compared to the mental torment I was going through due to the inner conflict between a world of unbelievable things happening around me and the existence of another world inside me, one of different memories, but nevertheless complete and lucid.

My mature judgment, the result of my age, had taught me how to distinguish the real from the unreal and my exceptionally good memory was flooding my mind with images and events from my past, in sharp detail, exactly as I had lived them. I was functioning perfectly, as I remembered myself. But so did all the mad things around me…

I was certain it was me; on the verge of a nervous breakdown, yes, but it was me! Once, when I was in the presence of the Ilectors, I broke down and started to weep, that’s all… And in any case, I don’t think that anyone could confidently say that they’d be able to control their nerves in such a situation.

These last few days I haven’t seen anyone else apart from the two physicians. The nurses were being kept away from me following the episode with the mirror, when I first saw my new face and went berserk. The new physician stood by me as a kind and skilful healer, but also as a silent partner, who always avoided looking straight into my eyes whenever we were alone and who always had a hint of agitation in his gaze.

The day before yesterday, the chief physician, Professor Molsen, unexpectedly came to my chamber in the afternoon. He seemed more excited than usual. He told me to stand up and, holding me by the arm, helped me walk to the adjoining drawing room. I realised at that moment that a whole new world was opening up before me. Sometimes I find myself overpowered by a newfound, child-like eagerness. I hadn’t felt so impatient since I was a young boy!

I stood at the entrance for a while, looking at the drawing room. It was a strangely large room with all kinds of bizarre—for me—things and that tall, transparent door that offered a panoramic view of the lush countryside, the mountain slopes and beyond. Then I started walking again, but not for long. Every two steps I stopped and peered about. At some point, I turned around and saw the physician looking at me with a curious expression on his face. I’ll never forget that look, but at that moment I cared about nothing.