Near Miss

Viv held Stone’s chin in her hands and looked into his eyes. “You’re not well,” she said. “Not yet.”

“Funny, that’s what the doctor says, too, and it’s why we’re dining in.”

He started to rise, but she pushed him back into the sofa. “I’ll get the drinks. You just sit there and look pretty.”

“Whatever you say,” Stone replied.

Dino looked at him closely, too. “She’s right,” he said.

“She usually is,” Stone agreed. “Look, I’m taking her advice.”

“That’s a smart move. Otherwise, she’ll beat you up.”

Chapter 13

Stone nodded off over brandy and had to be taken upstairs by Dino, using the elevator. There he delivered Stone to the tender mercies of Matilda, who got him into a nightshirt, his favorite mode of dress at bedtime when he wasn’t naked for a good reason.

Matilda slept next to him, checking his inert form every time she rolled over. He was always the same.

Stone woke, rested and clearheaded for the first time since suffering the blow. Matilda was nowhere to be found. He had breakfast in bed, read the Times, and did the crossword. Finally, he got to his feet and walked around without falling down or bumping into anything. He shaved and took a shower without either cutting his throat or slipping on the wet tiles. Finally, he got dressed and walked downstairs to his office, just as if he were perfectly well.

“You look perfectly well,” Joan said, when she came to inspect him.

“Thank you, that’s exactly how I feel, just don’t hit me over the head with anything.”

“I’ll try to avoid that.” His phone rang, and Joan answered it at his desk. “Surprise,” she said, “Dino on one.”

Stone picked up. “Good morning.”

“You sound — I don’t know, normal,” Dino said.

“And that’s how I feel.”

“Dinner tonight, Clarke’s?”

“See you then. Viv?”

“Maybe. Matilda?”

“Maybe. I haven’t seen her this morning.”

“Whatever.” Dino hung up.

“Matilda went back to her place,” Joan said. “She didn’t say why or for how long.”

“Perhaps I’ve been inattentive,” Stone said.

“Perhaps.” The phone rang. Stone picked it up before Joan could. “Hello?”

“You sound normal,” Matilda said.

“I am normal,” he replied.

“I’m doing laundry.”

“You could have done it here.”

“I needed fresh clothes. You were getting tired of the ones I was wearing.”

“Your imagination,” he said. “Dinner tonight at Clarke’s?”

“Where we met! How romantic!”

“Shall I pick you up?”

“I’ll meet you there. I’ve got a previous engagement with Bloomie’s.”

“I wouldn’t want to come between you two. Seven?”

“Good.” Everybody hung up.

“Well,” Joan said, “I guess you’re officially normal.”

They assembled in the bar at P. J. Clarke’s, had a drink, then went to their table.

“Did you notice the man in the blue blazer a couple of seats down the bar from me?” Matilda asked.

“I didn’t,” Stone replied.

“I did,” Viv said. “Who is he?”

“I don’t know his real name, but he’s called Bozo. He worked at that athletic club for Huff, whom you will recall.”

“Actually, I recall nothing about Huff. First, he was standing behind me. After that, he was dead, and I was unconscious.”

“You’ll have to trust me, then,” Matilda said. “Bozo was Huff’s assistant. I knew about them both from Trench.”

“He looks well-muscled under the blazer,” Viv said.

“Trust you to notice that,” Dino interjected.

“Trench admires people who can fight,” Matilda said. “And, after all, Bozo does work in a gym.”

Dino looked at Stone. “Are you packing?”

Stone sucked his teeth for a moment. “I forgot,” he said.

“Well, Viv and I both are, so we’ll shoot anybody who bothers you. After this, though, you’re on your own.”

“I’ll try and remember that,” Stone said.

“I’ll remind him,” Matilda said.

“Are you packing, Matilda?” Dino asked.

“My bags or my gun?”

“Do you own a gun?”

“Trench left one at my apartment once and never came to get it.”

“Are you licensed?”

“No.”

“Do you know how to shoot a gun?”

“Yes, my father taught me.”

“I’ll send you the license application. Don’t leave your house in possession of a weapon until you’ve got the license in hand. I’ll expedite it.”

“Thank you, Dino.”

“Also, I don’t think you should keep the gun Trench left at your apartment. You don’t know where it’s been or what it’s done.”

“I’ll send it back to him, then.”

“Unload it first, and put the cartridges into a separate bag. Don’t mail it. Send your doorman to his place with it securely wrapped. You want it off your hands as soon as possible.”

“Why don’t I have Fred pick it up from your place and deliver it?” Stone said.

“Everybody is so solicitous,” she said.

“We have to be,” Dino replied. “When you have a gun.”

Chapter 14

Matilda’s carry license turned up, hand-delivered, two days later, and Stone took her downtown to a gun store frequented by cops.

“This is a wonderland of mayhem,” she said, looking around at the showcases and wall display of weapons.

“You need to choose only one,” Stone said, leading her to a showcase. “Let me see your hand.”

She spread her fingers.